Mark Zian

Mark Zian
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January 4, 2011 by MZ

Tropicana

Due to the floods in North Queensland, my trip to the tropics has been extended. It’s growing on me but I think I have been spending too much time in my own head. Anyway, in the spirit of sharing, I thought I would share a tropical recipe.

Coconut Rissoles

500 grams mince

2 eggs

1 chopped onion

Add desiccated coconut to bind mixture

You might be thinking “Don’t you use breadcrumbs rather than coconut to bind the mince?” Ordinarily you would be correct however this recipe was once used by my dad, maybe minus the onion, to make my sister and I Rissoles. Mum was away for work so dad decided that he would make them, however due to a football injury he lacks a sense of smell and the containers were not labeled so we ended up eating some Tropical Rissoles. I stomached only one, but my gutsy sister got down two. It destroyed Rissoles, coconut and gravy for me. I have only started to be able to enjoy these foods again recently. Below is my castaway photo.

End of Transmission.

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December 27, 2010 by MZ

Imitations of Life

I’m staying at my Aunty’s in Cairns, it’s a nice modern house situated in the perfect suburban neighborhood. It reminds me of the movie The Truman show. I started thinking “did I totally miss the point of that movie?” Is it just about a man living a fake existence and being watched by the real world or is it a comment on “the real world”. Does it poke fun at society, about the conventional path and the picturesque suburbia that most of us seem to be striving for? All I do know is that it is questioning what is real and so am I.

I have been thinking about my life choices and the effect they will have on my future. I see my cousins happy in their relationships, one with two beautiful children, and my aunty and uncle, living it up, part-time in suburbia and part-time as grey nomads. All because they have the money to support these things. Here I feel like an alien, like a bum that has never worked a day in his life, a delusional dickhead with a pipe-dream.

I was bored and it’s been raining alot here so I brought some movies. I watched “Trainspotting” and my family couldn’t handle the language saying it was unnecessary. I agree that it is unintelligent, but nothing can show passion like screaming “fuck you” in somebody’s face. But what this really comes down to is art. This whole “art imitates life” business, swearing exists and it’s real however the majority of people don’t want reality, they don’t want movies or music, about sex, drugs or death, not if it’s set in a context where it could or has happened. They don’t want to feel like shit, they want to, for a few hours, bury there head in the sand and feel good, not a care in the world, it’s all good. I have tried to argue with these people, but to them im an idiot.

So fuck it, the career is in the bin, it’s all good let’s see where this takes me.

Sorry about the spelling and grammar, I don’t have a computer with me or the patience.

Posted in Thoughts · 1 Reply ·

Archive

December 21, 2010 by MZ

On the road again

I find myself on the road again. This year has included three long distance driving trips, the first to Melbourne, the second to Sydney and now finally to Cairns. This one however is a little different, this one is with family.

To back up a few steps, Friday was my last day at work, and it ended with the firm Christmas party. The day saw me nostalgic of the filing room, the water tap and the friends that I had made. The night was characterised by way too much alcohol and left me with a feeling of dread for a few days. I have realised that it is possible to become attached to anything, but some things need to be left behind.

I’m feeling a lot better now and have just left Mackay on the way to Cairns. Dad is currently in the back singing along to Bill Callahan. He is trying to tease his voice but funnily enough he is doing quite well, at the singing, not the teasing.

He has been getting furious in that backseat, firstly with the music I have been playing and secondly with slow drivers. Yesterday there was a painful old man driving at 10 below the speed limit, so when we were stopped at some road works Dad decided that he would get out of the car and tell the guy what he thought. After a few minutes Dad returned to the car and Mum locked his window, because she was worried that he would carry through with his threat to throw the steering lock out the window when we passed the slow old man.

What a way to start the festive season.

Posted in Random, Thoughts · 3 Replies ·

Archive

November 25, 2010 by MZ

Dead Plants

I have realised that blogging takes a lot of time, so does facebook, and all of that crap. It’s like trying to keep up with friends. Sometimes you really want to, but there just isn’t time to have all of these people in your life.

I had drinks with an old friend last night and it was excellent to catch up. He gave me an interesting quote. “If my friends were plants, they would be dead already”. I think I am much the same. Except I think with good friends, it doesn’t really matter how much you see them, because when you do, there is always that connection. Maybe only the acquaintances drop of and die. However sometimes I do feel very nostalgic about the people that have passed through my life. 

I’m pretty appalling when it comes to time management, so this nostalgia never really motivates action. I constantly have a big list of things that I should be doing, but they usually all get forgotten and I work on writing or music. There is probably some divine balance between life and art, but I am yet to find it.

In other news my friend Ricky took some photos of me the other day, for promotional stuff etc. I like them, I don’t really like the shots with the guitar in them, but Ricky says that I’m a musician and that I should shut up. He is probably right and I think his photos are amazing.

Check out flickr if you want to see the rest. http://www.flickr.com/photos/wickee/sets/72157625437557914/

20101107-MZ-70

20101107-MZ-69

20101107-MZ-28

20101107-MZ-15

20101107-MZ-100

20101107-MZ-21

Posted in Pictures, Random, Thoughts · 1 Reply ·

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November 18, 2010 by MZ

Auditors Brain: Construction Site Toilet

I did the deed and will be finishing on 17 December 2010. Now time to find a new job. This could be messy. In loving memory of my time as an auditor, I thought I would post the following poem. It was written on the toilet while I was working at a construction site in Varsity Lakes. Enjoy.

Auditor’s Brain: Construction Site Toilet

Live life with the same disconnection that exists while watching a movie
Revel in the sensation of feeling and existence, not only in those sensations that we
are conditioned to believe are positive.
Let your nose be rubbed into life
while your there take a whiff
then a breath.
Do not let comfort make you fat and lazy
Do not let your convictions hold you back.
Just change them and if that doesn’t work change them back.
Live by your own rules and only live your own life.
Take the risk
Work hard
Save the money
Throw it away
Roll in the dirt
Do it again
Let it change you
Be stiff and bre-
ak your
arm
The healing has fused the bones and made me a cripple
Play it like a video game.
Get yourself into trouble
Get hurt
Turn off the console
Laugh about misfortune
Turn it back on
Do it again
Servant in your old clothes
Not in your new.
Look out the window
Decide it looks shit
Close the doors and windows
Turn on the air con
Let the artificial lights keep us warm
Paint a picture
Stick it in the window
Gaze out the window
Looks much better
Just can’t walk outside
Close eyes
Let the dream take you there
HA.

Hopefully, this means that I will start to take my own advice.

Posted in Poems/Lyrics, Thoughts · Leave a Reply ·

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November 17, 2010 by MZ

Signs from Above

Today was my first day back at work after the Knee Chin holiday/tour. Which definitely wasn’t really a tour, but it was fun and a learning experience all the same. I will post a tour diary soon, I am currently just waiting on the photos from Callum.

Anyway, to the point. I went to work today feeling like I had made my decision. I was going to give the new role, a three month trial. However after arriving at work this didn’t seem right. Then after having a discussion with one of the HR ladies, I was feeling pretty sure that things could never really change and that the only way to solve things, would be to escape before the building collapses.

I decided to get back to work, however while trying to work Cat Stevens told me ‘you may be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not’ this compelled me to make a decision, so decided to source a magic 8 ball. However as one was not readily available, I was prompted to download the app on my phone. I proceeded to question said app, three consecutive times, well actually four.

Me: Should I quit my job?
Ball: Without A Doubt
Me: Should I quit my job?
Ball: Yes, Definitely
Me: Should I quit my job?
Ball: Concentrate and ask again
Me: Should I quit my job?
Ball: Outlook Good

So there you go, I should quit my job and the outlook will be good. So that is what I am going to do. I will tell the boss tomorrow morning. Unless I chicken out and change my mind. Oh glorious indecision.

I will keep you posted.

Posted in Random, Thoughts · 1 Reply ·

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November 9, 2010 by MZ

Decisions

In case anybody is wondering, I actually wrote the following post yesterday. So when I say today, I actually mean yesterday. I understand that this is not going to affect anybody, however I just felt that If I didn’t write this disclaimer I would confuse people, however I am now thinking that I have just confused myself.

So…..the partners at work have finally gotten back to me and have decided to give me what I want (i.e. less responsibility). My reply to this was “I’m not sure if I want that or if I would rather just resign, can I please have the week to think about it?”. So that’s what I am doing. If anybody would like to provide me with some profound advice, please feel free.

Today I am also working, on the first day of my annual leave, now that is dedication. To go along with my thinking, I have quite a big week ahead. Mainly because Knee Chin are going on tour. It’s only a small 3 show jaunt to Newcastle and Sydney, but I am quite excited. Mainly because I get to have some time off and play in a band that I really love. This is an interesting concept for me, as previously being in a band in which I wasn’t the main songwriter really got to me, as I felt I should be focusing on my own work. With Knee Chin this isn’t the case. I think it’s probably for a couple of reasons, firstly I love the guys. I enjoy practice and shows just because I get to hang out with friends. Secondly of course is the music. I love Aidens songs, and I love how we write together as a band, it feels free and easy and we don’t really have to think, we just play and it works. Well at least I think it does. The best thing is that we don’t tell each other how to play our instruments.

The tour should be interesting. I’m really anal about most things so I might drive the guys crazy. But I guess that’s all part of the fun. I have already laid down the rules, about smoking in the car. Makes we seem like the dad of the band. Luckily I play the dad guitar (hahaha dad joke). I might keep some sort of tour diary so expect something about the tour in later posts.

In other news….yesterday I had a photoshoot with my friend Ricky. It was interesting, I feel uncomfortable in front of a camera but he made it feel really natural cause he would just talk to me and I would forget that he was taking photos. I really love his photos, but we are both thinking that they might not really suit my style. I don’t really know. But it was a good experience all the same. After the shoot we went for Korean BBQ, it was really good but I ate way too much.

IMG_0246

Today I feel a bit sick, maybe it was the food, maybe its just the weekend catching up with me. Speaking of catching up with me. I put my car in for service today, and I just got it back. Turns out that it will cost $570 to fix its various problems, the big problem is that they can’t do it prior to the tour. So fingers are crossed that my car doesn’t die on the way to Sydney.

Posted in Random, Thoughts · 4 Replies ·

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November 2, 2010 by MZ

“My life can only breakout in songs that have no purpose”

Yesterday I was reading a review of, “Get on Jolly – Bonnie “Prince” Billy and Marquis de Tren”, an EP that I have been listening to recently . I really enjoy it, its soft and thoughtful and just sits really well with me. So here is the review if anybody is interested http://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/700-get-on-jolly-ep-with-marquis-de-tren/.

Anyway the phrase that got to me was “Not that this 21-minute, six-song EP is purposeless; it just lacks any apparent direction or palpable momentum”

This made me think of a couple of critiques that I have received about my own work and also got me thinking about the use of the words direction and purpose when it comes to art.

Firstly with my own experiences. The first being the time that I showed a work colleague a song of mine (“I am not a Robot”, from my “Is this ok?” album). Her comment was “It sounds nice, but it doesn’t go anywhere”. To which I answered “where is a song suppose to go?”. I have hear these sorts of comments a lot when referring to music, writing and art. But do people really consider the purpose of a piece of art before they make such comments? It seems to me that some times this comment its self can show a lack of understanding of a piece. For example, I wrote the following poem, a few years back in a creative writing elective, while I was doing my accounting degree.

This is a mundane poem about my life
I wake in the morning, I go to work
The files are in order, I go home
I do the dishes, I go to sleep
I wake in the morning,
Today I’m going to walk into a car.
Why do I work?

I wrote the poem just as a bit of a crack at myself for my pending career at the time and the comment I received from the tutor was. “Mark, for such a short poem, emotive language must be used for it to be effective”. To this I explained that the purpose of the poem was for it to be boring, she found it hard to understand why somebody would write a boring poem, to which I explained that it is a boring poem, about a boring thing. What could be more fitting. In my opinion it achieves its purpose, and I don’t think that I’m about to write an emotive poem about my life in accounting. I agree, this is not an amazing piece of writing. I wouldn’t even describe it as good. Rather I would describe it as fitting. The point that I am getting at is that not even piece of art is intended to be a grand statement and therefore it should not all be judged if it were.

Bringing me back to the lack of apparent direction or palpable momentum. It seems to me that most peoples lives have a lack of apparent direction or palpable momentum. So if art is the expression of feelings and experiences of an artist, isn’t it possible that the direction and momentum was quite apparent. I think that in many cases it is futile to try and comment on the meaning or purpose of a piece of art, because in many cases making such a comment, only highlights our own lack of understanding.

Welcome to the completion of my rant. Please feel free to argue with me. Also if anybody is offended by any spelling or grammatical errors. Feel free to send me corrections. Until next time.

End Transmission.
Posted in Thoughts · 4 Replies ·
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